jia you min
Hi.
I am really missing home now. I wanna be at home so badly, right now. and I've started to regret why didn't I go home earlier this week. it's about 4 days to exam now and i can't be travelling to and fro with this short amount of time, without spending much time with my mii and dii. Adding to the fact that I am still so far from being prepared for this exam.
This morning I woke up with a sore throat. and in the afternoon I started having myalgias. Soon after, I was having some mild headache. The aches in my arms, I couldn't really tell whether they have actually been there for the past few weeks. But it feel different. It's not the tremulous weak feeling that I got from side effects of caffeine. It feels like I'm down with flu or something. Immediately I was so worried because I can't afford to be sick at this crucial time. If it's a viral infection, it will take a week to recover. And I obviously do not have enough time for that.
I'm having pretty frequent crying spells lately. I'm not sure whether I should put the blame on my hormones. Or maybe it's an accumulative effect. After 3 weeks under great stress and worries and most of the time I'm all on my own. This is actually the first time I'm so far from home at the time when I need support from my family the most. When I feel weak I would think of my mii and dii, and my bubbly brother at home. It would be heavenly to just think about being with them. They do magic. All sorrows go away when I see them. I don't know how it works but it always does.
4 more days min. So many times I've told myself to stay strong. I can do it when I don't focus on my weaknesses. I have to stay strong. I'm in my twenties, and I am an adult. I can't be relying on my mii and dii for the rest of my life. But deep in my heart I always feel I can never leave them, no matter where I am and what I am doing. I feel like a baby sometimes. and I refuse to grow up.
I can't wait to get over with all these shit I'm going through now. It feels so bad. So awful. And it hurts so much. I wonder if this is how life treats us. Nothing comes easy. I know about this. But does it have to be so tough all the time?
I wonder why would I be crying. I can't pin point a single emotion. I just want to go home. That's all.
I am really missing home now. I wanna be at home so badly, right now. and I've started to regret why didn't I go home earlier this week. it's about 4 days to exam now and i can't be travelling to and fro with this short amount of time, without spending much time with my mii and dii. Adding to the fact that I am still so far from being prepared for this exam.
This morning I woke up with a sore throat. and in the afternoon I started having myalgias. Soon after, I was having some mild headache. The aches in my arms, I couldn't really tell whether they have actually been there for the past few weeks. But it feel different. It's not the tremulous weak feeling that I got from side effects of caffeine. It feels like I'm down with flu or something. Immediately I was so worried because I can't afford to be sick at this crucial time. If it's a viral infection, it will take a week to recover. And I obviously do not have enough time for that.
I'm having pretty frequent crying spells lately. I'm not sure whether I should put the blame on my hormones. Or maybe it's an accumulative effect. After 3 weeks under great stress and worries and most of the time I'm all on my own. This is actually the first time I'm so far from home at the time when I need support from my family the most. When I feel weak I would think of my mii and dii, and my bubbly brother at home. It would be heavenly to just think about being with them. They do magic. All sorrows go away when I see them. I don't know how it works but it always does.
4 more days min. So many times I've told myself to stay strong. I can do it when I don't focus on my weaknesses. I have to stay strong. I'm in my twenties, and I am an adult. I can't be relying on my mii and dii for the rest of my life. But deep in my heart I always feel I can never leave them, no matter where I am and what I am doing. I feel like a baby sometimes. and I refuse to grow up.
I can't wait to get over with all these shit I'm going through now. It feels so bad. So awful. And it hurts so much. I wonder if this is how life treats us. Nothing comes easy. I know about this. But does it have to be so tough all the time?
I wonder why would I be crying. I can't pin point a single emotion. I just want to go home. That's all.
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