Energizer is all i need.

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Before I could realize, it was already the start of the second week of my third and last system of the semester. Everything seemed so fine until I noticed the most important exam ever is in less than 6 weeks time.

I have been tired. Everyday. For the past one week, I had troubles going to bed. And I did not feel like I have got enough rest in the morning. I had no clue why it happened but eventually I figured out a few possible pathogenesis. ( I assume this is abnormal and unhealthy, so I used the word 'patho-'.) It was the first week of the new system and I had three morning sessions as early as eight in the morning. And I did not have any naps in the afternoon. This might be one of the reasons why I feel tired all day long. However, if I was really tired, I should fall asleep easily at night. But it turned out to be the opposite. I tried buying myself drinks in between lectures, just so that it might help waking me up. But apparently it did not help much. In the end of the day, all I had was frustration over frustration. I delayed my work and stress built up. The bad cycle never stops.

It is a torment feeling sleepy and not energetic. And I obviously do not like it at all.

Time is running short. I have to be clear in mind what I am doing all the time. And I cannot afford to skip any lecture notes for everyday. This is all that I know.

I need lots of boosters. Probably something like an adrenaline shot might help.

But I know, no matter how tired I might get, I need to stop all the bull-shit. Yes I considered them as bull-shits because I believe that human beings, especially doctors, survive by 50% energy and 50% adrenaline-shot effects. And I truly need that right now.

Right now I am still figuring out ways to keep myself awake. I have to get enough sleep. I don't really mind how late I sleep at night if I have enough hours of sleep everyday, which is only applicable on days when I do not have early morning sessions.

I have to be more energetic, more motivated, more hardworking and more passionate towards my work, my studies. Because I decide my future. The number of doctors has been shooting and I would have no place to stand if I do not have the competence. Now is the time when I start building my career, my future.

All the best, Ym.


With much love and passion,
Ym

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