The Pacinian corpuscle

Hi. I am really missing home now. I wanna be at home so badly, right now. and I've started to regret why didn't I go home earlier this week. it's about 4 days to exam now and i can't be travelling to and fro with this short amount of time, without spending much time with my mii and dii. Adding to the fact that I am still so far from being prepared for this exam. This morning I woke up with a sore throat. and in the afternoon I started having myalgias. Soon after, I was having some mild headache. The aches in my arms, I couldn't really tell whether they have actually been there for the past few weeks. But it feel different. It's not the tremulous weak feeling that I got from side effects of caffeine. It feels like I'm down with flu or something. Immediately I was so worried because I can't afford to be sick at this crucial time. If it's a viral infection, it will take a week to recover. And I obviously do not have enough time for that. I'm ha...

我好像爱上某人了。是某人和某人欸。是谁啊。 我好像爱上你了。怎么办。 哈哈哈 又有某人说，要有爱情，必须先有爱。要有爱，必须先付出爱。要付出爱，必须先感受到爱。我说，这些东西怎么被复杂化呢。什么人让你开心让你舒坦那就多跟这些人聚在一块吧。然后爱不爱什么的顺其自然吧。有感觉就好，没感觉也无所谓。我说，何必要下定义这该是感觉，还是感情还是付出的爱情呢。 其实啊，人在面对高端压力的时候，真的什么事情都干得出来。比如：轻易爱上某人。或者，错以为这是爱。 可是确实，对我来说只要让人感到舒坦然后很向往的那种好的感觉就必须包含爱啊。所以我开心的时候，我在爱。付出还是被爱那么重要吗。 一个人到了无法自拔的空虚或者过度饱满的时候，这种事常会发生。因为我们连自己在感受什么也无可判别了。反正，感觉的东西这么抽象，而且只有自己知道。要怎么取决它属于哪一块，真的自己说了算啊。所以有什么大不了呢。要给他下定义其实只是想给自己一个肯定。因为有人认为有了肯定心会更舒坦。可是对我来说，有了肯定就会有否定。因为取下定义，所以会有新的期望。有期望便有失望。人啊，干嘛给自己制造坑洞呢。有时还要安置地雷。 不必要的事不做。 爱，反正是无所不在。关键在于我们要不要在乎它。

If you ask me what I need the most now, I would say I would want to have a hug from you. I always tend to get butterflies in my stomach whenever I am alone, either in the library or at home. And after a while I'll feel like going to the loo. The cycle repeats. It sounds so much like an inflammatory bowel syndrome. It's been like this for quite some time now. I tend to become nervous when I'm alone. But these symptoms disappear when someone is around. Anyone will do, actually. I feel like hugging you so much now. I can't recall when I last went home. I forgot the smell of my room. I forgot how fluffiness could soothe me in bed. 3 more weeks to go. And then I'll either have to go through the whole thing again, or, I move on to a higher level of suffering. I used to hear this from my mother, that human beings are born to suffer. Everyday, we learn how to relieve sufferings, which ultimately becomes the aim of our goals in life. I am suffering. And every morning...

2016年了。四处烟花释放，开心的气息皆是。 我独自在家，手里捧着书本，听着隔壁邻居家在开盛会的声音，此起彼落，充满生气。 24岁了，新的一年有什么新的期望呢？ 做人啊 要回到初衷 回到根本 接下来的12个月里，我不知道会发生什么事情。但是无论是好是坏，不能改变的是初衷，坚守的是信念。人生苦短，但是要活得精彩。过去的几个月不够精彩，接下来的日子必须活得更自在了。 要活在当下。活在当下。活在当下。不活在过去，也不活在未来。用心聆听，用体肤感受身边的一切一切。嘴角上扬，必须发自内心。眼里容下的是好的事情，耳朵听的是美丽的故事，嘴里说的也是让人听了舒心的话语。 2016年必须属于自己的。此时此刻虽然明天显得如此不可估计，我还是非常希望能够通过考试，向梦想前进，活得更自在。要活出自我啊。过去的心态不健康，很多时候忘了活着的是自己，不是别人，不为别人而活。 要开心。要发自内心的开心。真心对人，真心对自己，真心对周遭的所有人事。 要认真地生活。认真对待每时每刻。要珍惜家人，珍惜朋友，珍惜自己所拥有的一切。 要学习施舍，学习造福，学习分享。